Well meaning, loving Saboteurs...

Still have to do Fire 45 E-Z tonight, but I am looking forward to it.

I love my husband, adore him more than is reasonable much of the time. He is thoughtful, appreciative, and even occasionally romantic - I mean he is a guy, so I figure occasionally is pretty good... However, he is a diet saboteur. A thoughtful one, but a saboteur none the less. I can resist junk food that is not in the house. For the most part I can resist much of the junk that is IN the house. I cannot resist my favorites when they are brought to me with love. He brought me hostess cupcakes this afternoon. I have major chocolate needs on a daily basis any way and this undid me. I did not ask for it, I didn't even really think of it (except in passing) but I scarfed down those cakes like a starving woman.

This is part of my process, and certainly something I need to learn. How do I look at cake and not eat so much of it that I make myself sick? How do I politely take, and then never eat - favorite foods brought lovingly to me? In large part I am doing better with food, but it is a constant struggle. I stop nearly every day for a piece of chocolate after school. I am ashamed when I do it, I eat it compulsively with no joy and more guilt than I care to admit. And I still do it everyday. I need to find a way to live without sweet. Not sweets, but sweet in general. I love honey and raw sugar and maple syrup and sweetened coffee with splenda... but I think this is all bad for me.  I need to find a way to limit or cut out completely my need for a sweet fix during the day. But where do I start?